Thursday, 11 August 2016

Etat d’ame

I've been away from this place for a month now, it was an unplanned absence (and it has been noticed at least by one of my reader ;). 

Honestly, during this past month, it felt that my world has been shattered, not shattered in big visible way.  It's more my inner world which has shifted. 

For many many summers, our holidays rhymed with family road trips. Actually, this blog started with posts about our first road trip in the States, way back in 2007. It was written with 6 hands, Alice, philippe and myself.  But this year, things changed, and there are signs of more changes to come. 

It started with Victor's graduation in early July.  He's soon going to be on his way to college. The same weekend, we celebrated Philippe's and Juliette's birthdays, the five of us, plus one. The 'plus-one' being Alice's boyfriend.  He seems a gentle caring person and a nice addition to our family circle (hopefully, he feels the same about us). 

Then Alice took off for a summer-long internship and wasn't able to come with us. Good opportunity shouldn't be turned off, so we road-tripped in Oregon without her, making me feel somehow guilty and not fully embracing the experience.

Finally, Juliette, who's a junior this year (a junior!) went for a week long workshop in Art college. The clock is ticking here too and Senior year and college visits are going to be upon us very soon.

All positive events, so why am I feeling off?  Probably because my life as I have been used to is shifting, changing. You can argue that we've been through many, many changes, moving around the world as we did.  Until now, I’ve been Philippe’s wife, the kids’ mother.  My days, my life has been shaped by theirs, from where we’re living to what we’re going to eat for dinner. 

Once again, nothing dramatic, I just need to re-evaluate, re-adjust and carry on.

It is somehow scary, but I am also feeling some kind of accomplishment when I see how they have turned out (and I know the job is not done yet).

Dinner at the Waldorf

In other news, my Grand-Mother is 95 today.

Philippe

1 comment:

  1. What. A beautiful grand mother. So looking forward to seeing her this winter and all of you hopefully. Times change and it s hard but if I could be as good as you with my own family then it will probably easier to adapt. Or not. ... What a beautiful wife and mother you are. Love you heaps

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